brodakota: (Default)
brodakota ([personal profile] brodakota) wrote2016-01-07 05:27 pm
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Message Box - Empathieas

There will always be birdseed available, so feel free to drop him a line.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10191388)

[ Action ] - Around the library building

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-02-26 11:48 am (UTC)(link)
[North would have noticed a certain lack of an appearance from Poe. Not even a casual jog on by since Poe would have been doing that once he found out where his friend lived. It would have given them plenty more chances to speak in passing. Poe wouldn't be in his normal spots if North was trying to find him at any on point this past week.

Poe was out today because he was done doing things at home. He couldn't stay in there for long and he wanted to pick up a new book or a few of them. The only reason he headed towards the library was because there was less likely of encountering certain people. But he doesn't make it into the building yet. In fact he goes off to the side away from the sidewalk leading toward the building. His emotions were still off but not as strong as they had been. But when he gets lost in his thoughts there's no helping them sometimes.

The area he goes to darkens a bit while tiny sparks pop around him. Poe's own feelings have been of grief, doubt and mostly all aimed at himself. So he's not surprised by the sparks anymore. He seems a little frustrated on the outside which causes the area to heat up. Even though the area is dark the sparks light up the tiny open area he's currently standing in. Poe's glancing away from the sidewalk seeming staring at nothing in particular. He didn't want to enter the library like this. Nor did he really want to bother people as he felt this way.]
Edited (I thought I missed something sorry) 2017-02-26 11:49 (UTC)
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10126547)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-02-28 04:07 am (UTC)(link)
[It was probably strange for North to see the heating temperatures coming from Poe for once. He wasn't really enjoying it nor did he enjoy the sparks snapping around his own face. But as soon as the familiar voice calls out to him, he feels himself tense.

He knew that he'd end up seeing his friend sooner or later. But he wasn't expecting it when he was having a moment. Poe turned to face the side walk area that North was coming from. That's when he noticed the area was much darker and there was faint glow of red coming from the front buttons of his vest that he was wearing.]

North... [He shakes his head.] To be honest, no, I'm not. I'm sure that might have been obvious. [A hand gets used to gesture around him.]
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10191388)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-02 11:52 pm (UTC)(link)
I wonder what possibly could have given it away.

[There's a small bit of a tease in there. Since Poe knew that emotionland will show outward effects even if the user didn't want it to. He's been having a hard time trying to meditate the negative feelings away or pushing them back.

It had been better but he would get stuck within his thoughts. He looks up at his tall friend and he was always thankful that he never used his height in any intimidating matter. Although he knew that he would be able to handle it. But North always made himself approachable and he seemed genuinely caring in his words.]

If you're willing to listen I won't mind telling you. It might help settle a few wandering ones that I have.

Privacy would be best I don't want there to be any ears that can over hear something. [He doesn't want certain people to know right away. If they happen to find out, there's no stopping that. Poe will handle it as it comes to him. There might even be a small lift at the corner of his lips as North's suggestion of petting his cat.] Is it now? There might be other things that can make people feel better.

[Like hugs or general closeness.] But I wouldn't be opposed to giving Theta attention too.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10186938)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-03 04:46 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Poe doesn't think he would ever get close to walking himself off. He tries to work out through his emotions. Even if they can be frustrating and hurtful. He didn't want to express them anymore. Or have them control show when he's trying to let go and move on. It's the best option he has right now. He can poke at himself or even tease North depending on what happens.

There's a bit of sensitivity when the other wraps his arm around his shoulders. Poe tenses only a little a first before smiling as the other leads him along. The feeling is personable and he hasn't had much of that interaction in a while. It made him relax though as they walked. He would stay in step with him and stay close.]

Thanks, I know that you'll be able to help a little at least.

Theta doesn't oppose a lot of things unless he doesn't want the attention. There's plenty of affection anyone can give for another one.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10126586)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-04 04:54 am (UTC)(link)
[ Poe didn't mind animals really and lived in places always meant that it had good people within them. Homey environments were better ones. ]

It's okay, I'm kind of a surprise visit. There wasn't any time for you to clean and maybe the next time it won't seem too bad. But it still looks like you lived in it well.

[ He puts a hand up in a thinking position over the options. ] Probably tea... with honey might be the best option.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10191388)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-05 01:13 am (UTC)(link)
[ Poe goes over to the couch plopping down on the cushion that wasn't exactly near the cat. But he made his lap open for the idea if the cat wanted to come over for attention. He was mostly thankful to be inside while dealing with his negative emotions. He didn't want to scare Theta either.

When North came back he smiled at the offer mug of tea. Poe took it carefully in between his hands so that they can warm up a bit. ]

I broke Leia's trust by telling a man who seemed perfectly fine something that she didn't want to be told to him. I basically made her doubt her trust in me because of it. I know it was wrong and I'm dealing with it. I'm mostly angry at myself for letting it happen. But it happened.

I'm having a hard time dealing with the negative emotions. Learning the dunamis was good in one aspect but frustrating in a complete another. I have no control over them as you could see.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10144615)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-07 04:13 am (UTC)(link)
[ Poe looks downward watching Theta, he moves the mug into his other way away from the cat. His free hand moves to start petting between the cat's ears to keep him occupied while he takes a sip of tea. North really knew how to hit the questions correctly. ]

It's a bit more complicated than that. [ She didn't tell him directly. He should have put more thought into who he was speaking to at the time and who else was around in Verens. He never thought about it because this person never showed any threatening signs to him. ]

It is. [ There's a small spark with a pop coming from the side near the mug. ] But when you don't typically feel certain emotions all the time they can outrun the control you may actually have. I have been feeling some... really strong emotions that I hate feeling. Plus a lot of others. I'll try to do that though but I wanted to get some control in case it does any kind of real damage.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10191388)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-09 11:01 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Such a good cat, Poe will keep him distracted with his free hand petting him. He would at least try to keep Theta purring as he sipped at his tea. ]

Good suggestion, I think I have a spot in mind for that. I dislike feeling this way but I know it's for a good reason.

[ Even if it was supposed to be a joke, it's something he'll do because of the dunamis. He doesn't want to accidentally hurt anyone, not ever the friends he does have. ]

I have to leave it at it's complicated. [ Because Leia doesn't want anyone else to know who her father is and her relation to him. It's worse that she wanted the information away from Anakin who didn't even know who she was and he told him anyway. He sighs over that thought alone. ] It's something that's meant to stay a secret. I'm not telling anyone else.

It doesn't have to be advice. I just don't... want to hurt anyone else in the same matter as this. [ He goes silent for a moment. ] Or end up breaking trust.

[ He knows better now and was dealing with his punishment. He didn't want to sit around and not do anything about it. But Leia could be right in making it even worse if he did. A letter should be enough the rest would be up to chance. ]
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10191388)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-10 03:59 pm (UTC)(link)
I keep forgetting that you can provide something such as that. But even if you can shield those things I still don't want to hurt you accidentally. It's not something I'm fond of doing. It's definitely not something I want with how this place can be.

[ North is at least not being pushy and that's good. Poe would have been firm in his decision making because if North knows Leia he can't really tell him. And he wasn't going to tell anyone else. The damage of telling Anakin Skywalker was enough. He wasn't going to speak to anyone else unless they knew the situation directly. There were a few he could talk to about that. ]

I do appreciate what you are giving me though. Just being able to talk and you giving other ideas is enough. I know I shouldn't beat myself up over this. I feel... I feel as if I just became too comfortable.

[ There's a small frown as he puts his mug off to the side. Poe picks up Theta as he scoots a little closer to North while looking up at him. He places Theta into his lap while petting the cat so he doesn't become jealous. ]

I normally am more mindful. I think I'm more upset with myself over the entire situation. The only thing I can do is respect the individuals wishes that she gave to me. While being more mindful in the future. But at the same time a direct message would have been clearer to make a better judgement.

I should have realized the outcome but... that didn't happen.

[ He smiles a little at North. ]

And don't think that you haven't helped me. You have been. Even if you just listen that's more than enough.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10186938)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-14 09:33 pm (UTC)(link)
It's good to know that you can. But, [ He puts out a hand and places it on North's shoulder while looking up at him. ] I don't want to accidentally hurt you because there is no control. I don't know what you have seen. I've been in bad situations. I wouldn't want others to be in them too.

I just don't want it to continue to spiral and get worse. If that happens I'm going to feel guilty because I couldn't do anything about it. I'm respecting their wishes to stay away because she didn't want me correcting it. I have to go about it differently now. Plus I'll probably never be able to mend back that relationship. At least not for quite sometime.

It's true, it could have gotten out one way or another. But I had said it and made everything that much more worse. I created fear when that's not something I want to do. I can't fix. So that's making me frustrated and the way I feel currently. I've tried meditating... I don't know what else I could do.

[ He shakes his head while looking away from North. ]
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10134747)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-15 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)
I've been trying to make sure one doesn't happen back in my galaxy. My parents fought one. My father's fears is for it to have been all worth nothing. I try to protect everyone because it's all we have now.

It's something that happens but I don't have much else for it to go. I already created that fear in someone... I don't want to do it again. I know what I need to do. But I can't seem to shake the feelings though.

[ He sighs while running a hand through his hair. ]

This is me being myself. I do get frustrated, I do get worked up. But I don't have anywhere to put it besides creative emotional effects I would rather not create.
gotyourselfapilot: (pic#10126547)

[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-18 01:15 am (UTC)(link)
Normally I'm the needing to punch out my frustrations type. But this place would rather show fire and other effects. I doubt the punching bag would handle that.

There could be something that could work.

[ There's a small smile as looks at North as he grips his mug. ]

A good distraction might help.

[ And what he wants? He doesn't want North to be burden to. Later he'll try dealing with it himself alone. It might help him try to focus. But for now, a nice place distraction could help. ]
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[personal profile] gotyourselfapilot 2017-03-18 06:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Are you asking me out on a date? [ It was a joke but there might have sounded like a genuine question. Poe though continues on. ]

Going up to the mountains wouldn't be such a bad idea. Maybe not now though, maybe later during the nighttime.

[ He gives a shrug. ]

You've been a good distraction so far.

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